Paul Shaffer's book We'll Be Here The Rest Of Our Lives hit the shelves on Monday, so last night he found himself on his boss' couch. The band played "It's Raining Men" as he walked out, and David Letterman's first question was why.

Mr. Shaffer explained that in 1982 he was friends with Paul Jabara, the out gay man wrote "Last Dance" for Donna Summer. Mr. Jabara wanted to write a gay anthem, because discos were popular and New York's gay pride celebration was coming up. Mr. Shaffer said he's always been "liberal" and "open-minded" so he offered to help out.

Ms. Summer turned down the song. Being a recent born-again Christian, she didn't appreciate the words "Amen!" and "Hallelujah!" directly following "It's raining men!" Mr. Jabara hired a duo called Two Tons of Fun to record the tune, and he signed on to perform it with them at Gay Pride. He asked Mr. Shaffer to join him onstage.

Mr. Shaffer asked his fiancée (now wife) for her permission, and she put her foot down. What would the neighbors think if he was photographed at a gay pride rally? she screamed, and apparently "liberal" and "open-minded" only go so far. Mr. Shaffer demurred, though on event day he and his fiancée just happened to find themselves nearby . . . on bicycles . . . so they watched from the back.

Now, this story brings up several thousand questions, none of them good. In 1965, Charlton Heston and Dennis Hopper marched with Martin Luther King for civil rights. Seventeen years later, Mr. Shaffer is "liberal," "open-minded," and armed with the heterosexual proof of a fiancée, yet he won't be caught dead at a gay event? And why does he need to preface a story about gays by saying he's "liberal" and "open-minded"? Are these attributes really necessary to support us?

I'm thinking he should have just said some of his best friends are gay and left it at that.

Of course, I'm confused a lot these days. At some point we went from offensive stereotypes of homosexuals to non-offensive stereotypes of homosexuals, and I'm trying to figure out how that occurred. The performances didn't change, just the context. Did we decide that if a person declares they're pro-gay, they can suddenly lisp whenever they talk about San Francisco? If a celeb comes out in favor of gay marriage, can he hire someone to prance around in leather drag on his talk show? Is it a step forward or backward when a heterosexual man says it doesn't matter if he's gay, straight or bi, and then he proudly minces around the stage?

Clearly, we want all gay people to be accepted, whether they're regular guys or effeminate queens. When talk show hosts declare their support for our rights and then repeatedly act the queen, do we win?

I don't like this post-modern "acceptance" of homosexuality. It bothers me. I'll cut these folks some slack when they declare their support for undocumented workers and then bring out a sidekick wearing a poncho and a sombrero.

Of course all this talk leads straight to Craig Ferguson, and if I could answer these questions I'd be his biggest fan. That said, he's frequently brilliant, as last night's opening -- aided by a stereotypical gay and two audience members -- clearly shows.