Boxer David Haye certainly values trash talk when it comes to psyching out an opponent. Haye has previously called world heavyweight champion Nikolai Valuev "the ugliest thing I have ever seen," but he went even further in preparation for their upcoming bout in Germany.

"He's an ugly type of fighter, he tries to lean on you, tries to brawl and comes out with a really hairy chest that gets matted and is disgusting. . . . The size I am, I sort of come up to his chest . . . [and] I've never been a big fan of the matted hair in my face."

Oh. Gotcha. Getting repeatedly walloped by a seven-foot giant: not so bad. Having chest hair rubbed in your face: AIEEE!

I'm thinking at least a third of the gay men in America will head to their local sports bars to watch this bout. And the next day there'll be ten thousand new photos on AwkwardBoners.com.