Thursday, October 1, 2009

Michael Jackson was surprisingly healthy when he died, according to an AP news report. His heart was strong, his weight acceptable for his height. He had some arthritis, and reduced capacity in his lungs that might have left him out of breath. He had vitiligo on his chest, abdomen, face, and arms.

He had quite a few scars that were apparently the result of plastic surgery:
He had a 3/4-inch scar behind his left ear and another apparent scar behind his right ear. He had a scar beside each of his nostrils and another, 4-inch scar on his right shoulder. He had a pair of additional scars about 3-inches long at the base of his neck and smaller scars on his arms and wrist. He also had a small scar near his navel and a 2-inch scar on the right-hand side of his abdomen.He had a few facial tattoos, including a pink patch around his lips and black on his eyebrows. Most fans probably didn't realize he was balding, and had patches on his head tattooed "from ear to ear" to hide it.

The report closes with this:
The coroner also found Jackson was actively producing sperm.Oh. Okay. We really needed to know that. Now I can't stop picturing the reenactment on CSI:

MORGUE ASSISTANT: Ohmigod! Can't you stop it? Please, God -- SHUT IT OFF!

CORONER: I can't get close enough! AIEEE! I GOT IT IN MY EYES!

Thanks for that, guys.

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