This looks like some weird Photoshopped joke, but I swear it's straight off of Google, and there's a thousand more images just like it. I saw it in an ad on Towleroad where it was being touted as the perfect side dish, and I thought, wait: I realize Americans are fat, but are we really considering butter a course these days? My sister eats it with a fork, but I thought it meant she was weird.

I've been staring at it for much of the morning, but I'm still mystified. I'm leaning toward the idea that these are microwave bags of mashed potatoes, except maybe they've added so much butter that they're legally obligated to call them "butter." But then what about the phrase "Made with 100% real mashed potatoes"? Obviously this is a bullshit line, like Taco Bell saying their tacos are made with 100% real beef. After you joke that yes, it's probably best they don't make tacos with imaginary beef, you realize it doesn't mean anything, because aside from that 100% real beef they could have added 100% real sawdust for all you know.

Essentially, it's saying it's made with mashed potatoes. Which must mean it's not mashed potatoes, because when you buy soup, it doesn't say "Made with 100% real soup!" on it. But this can't be butter because of the phrase "Tastes as good as homemade!" as the top. Surely they're aware that my sister is one of the few chicks around with her own churn. And if this is butter, what's the phrase "With butter" doing on there?

Just when I think I've decided, I slide my eyes down to the bottom.

To make this "Homestyle Creamy Butter" "With butter," you've got to add butter.

I decide to pick up a box for my sister's Christmas present, and think about something else.