Sigh; he must be sooo proud. Five years after beloved TV therapist Dr. Phil's oldest son Jay married a Playboy model, another apple is dropping next to the same tree. According to CeleBitchy, Jordan McGraw is canoodling with Crystal Harris, the figure model also known as Hugh Hefner's fiancée.

I know the Dr. Phil compound must be buzzing with excitement this morning. Me, I'm over the moon. I just know those two kids are going to make the most wonderful family . . . after, you know, her sugar daddy dies. And maybe in a few years there'll even be a blessed event. I can already picture the baby shower, and Crystal opening a gift of crotchless diapers.

Anyway, call me Mr. Romantic. I just can't stop singing that old homespun ditty about a young man's fancy in springtime:

I want a girl
just like the girl
that most American males masturbate to.