Physicists at the Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory are reporting that they have discovered a new clue that could help unravel one of the biggest mysteries of cosmology: why the universe exists.

The new clue hinges on the behavior of particularly strange particles called neutral B-mesons. They oscillate back and forth trillions of times a second between their regular state and their antimatter state. The mesons go from their antimatter state to their matter state more rapidly than they go the other way around, leading to an eventual preponderance of matter over antimatter of about 1 percent, when they decay to muons.

Fuck it. Okay, an omnipotent old white guy made us.