I'm having some problems with the Ground Zero mosque controversy. First, the folks who are against building a Muslim cultural center so close to the 9/11 site says it shouldn't be allowed because it's insensitive.

Insensitive.

Yeah, that's what drives New York development. In fact, the only reason we let Donald Trump build here is because he cried during "Old Yeller."

Then Rudy Giuliani figured he should chime in. Evidently he was bored because everybody he knows is in jail.

He agreed that it's insensitive. He said people who'd build something like that weren't "healers." You know, like he is. Call him today at (212) 555-1872 for some focused visualization and a coconut-milk massage. No, those people are "warriors." Then he hailed a cab-driving warrior for an eight-dollar ride to his twenty-million-dollar home.

And today a man in a New York City cab asked his driver if he was Muslim. When the driver replied yes, the passenger stabbed him in the face.

Needless to say, now I'm waiting for Mr. Giuliani to reappear. I'm hoping he notices maybe he's a teensy bit responsible for this attack, and he says something about it. Like maybe he instructs all his faithful Christian followers not to stab cabdrivers in the face.

And, if he wants to be really sensitive, he could send a healer to the hospital to help a warrior out.