Monday, December 14, 2009

The ABC boycott is still barrelling along at full speed. Since they screwed Adam Lambert with their homophobia -- blurring out his man-on-man kiss, kicking him off Good Morning America like he was going to fellate some dude while Iowa housewives were drinking their wake-up Scotch -- I stopped watching their stupid little channel. Adios Cougar Town! Adios Extreme Makeover: Home Edition! Sure, I didn't watch them in the first place, but it's the thought that counts.

Some of my fellow protesters went even further, though. They emailed ABC advertisers to express their displeasure. I'll let the new Facebook group "Boycott ConAgra Foods Until They Change Their Homophobic Ways" tell you what happened next.

One of ABC's sponsors is Healthy Choice, which is a brand of the megacorp ConAgra Foods. While running my campaign encouraging ABC viewers to contact sponsors of ABC about the boycott for what that network did to Adam Lambert, I began getting reports that they could not e-mail my form letter to Healthy Choice/ConAgra because my letter contained profanity. After some research and investigation, it was discovered that ConAgra is blocking all messages with the word "homosexual" in them, with a message that instructs the user to "Please refrain from using profane or insulting language in this form."

Being gay or homosexual is not insulting or profane. ConAgra's policy of attempting to ignore people writing about its decision to run advertising on a homophobic network such as ABC is homophobic in and of itself. Therefore, I am now encouraging an immediate boycott of all ConAgra Foods brands until they resolve the matter and issue a public apology for their actions.

Those bastards! I thought. Right then and there I decided: From now on I wasn't eating Healthy Choice foods as a political act rather than a sensible one. With steam shooting out of my ears, I went to ConAgra's website and I typed out a furious little note sharing exactly what I thought about them.

Oh. Looks like they don't like any sexuals.

I think we better keep this to ourselves.

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