Scottish police have spent $350,000 on 22 unsuccessful court cases against a male stripper. The force alleges that Stuart Kennedy, 25, is impersonating a police officer when he does his "naughty cop": routine at bachelorette parties.
What? You're not a real policeman? Well, sorry to bother you, Officer Dangler of Squad 69.
Why I Should Not Multitask
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The other day, I was minding my business. Solstice was approaching, and I
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2 comments:
Well, let's see. His act is 1/2 hour long, and he gets 115 pounds for it. So, if he worked full-time (48 half-hour acts per day = 24 hours) that would be 5,520 pounds per day. (Stay with me here.) The government has spent 170,000 pounds so far unsuccessfully prosecuting him. At 5,520 pounds per day, 30 days of his time would cost ... 165,600 pounds. Hey! They could have just HIRED him to spend 30 days in jail, at his regular rate, and everyone would be happy! Ah well, that's the constabulary for ya.
Great minds think alike! I figured if they'd just stuffed money in his jockstrap -- one bill at a time, of course -- he'd have ditched Scotland for greener pastures at around the $10,000 mark.
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