Okay, maybe I'm gullible, but I didn't suspect for a second that a sinister plot was afoot. No, instead I mentally applauded these two pop culture icons for breaking the relentless bounds of peer pressure and disclosing their deepest, darkest secrets: Bill admitting he's homosexual while misspelling his last name, and Britney declaring that her vagina is oversized and dentally-gifted.

But alas, it turned out to be an exquisite hoax.

Bravo, David Sedaris Jr.! You caught me. Now go forth into the world with your sly satire! Bathroom stalls everywhere await.