Dear Right-Wing Movie Critics:

On the surface, you probably think the above comparison is okay. Both are small family films. Both are low budget. Both are fueled by good intentions.

Then we wade in further. In both, a decisive white woman follows her instincts, and the underdog wins big.

When we take that next step, though, and realize you're comparing Quinton Aaron to a brainless, easily-trained black animal, we think maybe you should change your question to "Could 'Secretariat' Win Big At The Box Office?" and hope nobody bombs your church.

Hope this helps,
RomanHans