Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I just spent 25 minutes online-chatting with "Cesar P" at Time Warner Cable.  It's a borderline interesting story: my cable didn't work for a week or so, so they issued me a credit refund. While they've been automatically debiting my checking account for my bill, though, they decided to send the credit somewhere else. Cesar said they'll phone me tomorrow if they can figure out where.

Anyway, I tried to save a transcript, but the chat box doesn't allow cut and paste, so I hit "View Source."  It didn't give me a transcript, but it let me see the list of words they filter so your outsourced "analyst" isn't constantly barraged with profanity.

PARAM NAME="ProfanFilters"
VALUE="bitch|shit|asshole|bastard|fuck|buttshit|fucker|
motherfucker|dammit|whore|slut|shitbag|shithead|ass|
cock|cocksucker|dick|penis|goddammit|asshat|sonofabitch|
nigger|honkey|honky|spic|sandnigger|cunt|pussy|funckin|
fuckn|dickhead|shitting|hell|cum|erection|hardon|
ejaculation|dildo|fuckhole|jysm|arse|twat|piss|wetback|
skeet|porchmonkey|fagget|fag|lesbo|homo|dike|coon|
muthafucker|faggot|faggit|spick|punta|fucked|fuckers|
bitches|bastards|motherfuckers|nigga|niggas|crotch|
mother fucker|bull shit|damn it|fucking moron|fucktard|
tard|gaytard|crack slut|crack whore|negro|pimp|pimp slap|
butt pirate|fudge packer|chinc|chink|slope|suck|camelfucker|
niggaz|bitchass|fuckboy|skank|retard|bustard|assholes|
phucktard|WTF|ahole|fuckwad|dickweed|shitface"

Got that? So if I typed in "Oh suck crotch jysm, you honkey crack slut!", for instance, Cesar would read "Oh, you!"

The list seems kind of strange to me. Asshat? Gaytard? Fuckwad? C'mon, we're talking about an overpriced CABLE COMPANY. Do they really spend that much time arguing with Bart Simpson? Besides, Time Warner Cable frequently appears to be run by phucktards; don't we have a constitutional right to tell them so? It hardly seems fair that after suffering through their miserable service we're stuck with calling them surly, beetle-headed strumpets.

Still, I'm proud to say this filter didn't alter my chat at all. But if your name is Dick Bustard and you like to shoot coon on the ski slope, maybe you'd better use the phone.

No comments:

StatCounter