I'm in a good mood these days, and I know exactly why. It's not because the weather is good. It's not because I've got a thoughtful new boyfriend. It's not because I have money in the bank.

Nope, the whole entire reason is this: I had an appointment at the dentist, but I called and cancelled it.

When you stop and think about it, it's obvious why this gives me such a high. Life smells sweeter when you're consciously dodging the dentist. I didn't realize this until I was thirty-something, then decided to milk it for all it was worth. Now I've always got a pending dentist appointment, and for months I live with the dread of it approaching. It's going to be awful, I think. He's going to take x-rays. He's going to find something horrible, and he's going to pull out all my teeth.

Mere hours before I'm due in that chair, when cold sweat has become a way of life, I call and cancel. "Would you like to reschedule for next week?" the receptionist asks. Not a chance, chick! I tell her. I'm gonna ride this high 'til it dies.

When my friends see me they realize something is different. Years ago they might have asked, "Roman, what's with the glow? Are you seeing somebody? Are you in love?" But now they know better. They see me floating on air, whistling as I tapdance down New York's sidewalks. They ask, "Cancel another tooth cleaning, dude?"

I just coyly smile and once again toss my beret into the air.

Actually, I'm surprised more people don't do this. We can't all afford weekends at Disney World. I don't know anybody getting promotions, or gorgeous apartments, or hot boyfriends. I don't know the last time I heard good news. Cancelling is cheaper than hillbilly heroin and just as effective.

Make an appointment with a dental professional. It'll just be a dark little blot on the horizon, slowly enlarging as it gets closer, but when you cancel it hits just like smack.

As for my breath, well, that's the best of it. Every time I exhale and see another person wince, I remember the best things in life are free.