I'm back.

First, thanks to Blue Star Ferries. I booked them to go from Santorini -- a Greek island paradise -- to Kos, an island just off the coast of Turkey.

I asked the owner of my hotel if there was a chance they'd cancel the ferry. "They never do," she said. I asked the local tourist office. Since she wasn't dependent on me for income, she literally laughed in my face. "They never do," she said.

They did.

So, instead of simply taking a cab to a ferry, I got to take a cab to a different ferry to a bus to a plane to another bus. I got to see a lot more scenery, and discovered that yes, I can still stay up 36 hours straight, though I start speaking in gibberish around hour 25.

On the plus side, Turkey was absolutely amazing. So many men, so few independent eyebrows: it's truly the Land that Manscaping Forgot. Here's a popular film star:


Yeah. And I thought Steve Carrell was gross.

Still, the men couldn't be friendlier. Five minutes after they start talking to you, they hug you and call you their brother. I've got two sisters, and I've got to say the dynamic with brothers is totally different. In eighteen years, my sisters never once chased me down the street screaming that I had to buy their rugs.