Friday, May 2, 2008

The "DC Madam" in charge of a high-class prostitution ring that catered to Washington's political elite has apparently hanged herself.

Deborah Jeane Palfrey, who once threatened to reveal the names of her powerful Washington clients, was found guilty of running a prostitution ring last month, and faced a sentence of up to twenty years in jail.

In 2007 one of Palfrey's coworkers, University of Maryland professor Brandy Britton, committed suicide after being arrested. She too hanged herself.

This serves as a very important lesson for young girls today. If you're going to service politicians, tell them you sent a copy of your diary to your lawyer and it'll be published if you ever "kill yourself."

The entire world is aghast after Paula Abdul judged a song that hadn't been sung yet, inadvertently revealing a bit of subterfuge behind the American Idol show.

To shore up her sinking reputation, Abdul has two guest appearances planned for next week. On Dancing With the Stars she'll announce the winners eight weeks before the show's live finale, and on Deal or No Deal she'll tell a Chicago woman which cases to avoid.

A Japanese civil servant was demoted for logging more than 780,000 hits on pornographic websites on his office computer, an official said Friday. Along with the demotion, he received a $190 monthly pay cut.

In his defense, the man maintains he actually only visited one dirty website, but it had 779,999 popups.

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