Since I am young and handsome, Wendy's food SUCKS.

New York recently passed a law that says all restaurants that provide nutritional information, whether on request or online, must include the same information on their posted menus. A few fast-food restaurants took exception to this, and decided to dodge the rule. They decided to make the nutritional information unavailable, thus avoiding the need to post it in the stores.

Wendy's defended this on their website:

"We fully support the intent of this regulation. However, since most of our food is made-to-order, there isn't enough room on our existing menu boards to comply with the regulation."

Now, if they'd taken Miss Duggan for English at Our Lady of Lost Causes High, they'd currently have an eraser wedged deep inside an ear. Because as she all-too-frequently told us, when one uses a "since" clause, the second half of the sentence has to be related to the first. And what does the fact food is made-to-order have to do with available space on a plastic board? It doesn't make any difference whether the food is made by squirrels from Lithuania, or has been laying around since Jesus took off: the menu originally listed stuff like HAMBURGER, CHILI, and SALAD MADE OUT OF OLD FRITOS, and now it'll say HAMBURGER 440 calories, CHILI, 330 calories, and SALAD MADE OUT OF OLD FRITOS 770 calories.

But no, rather than address us like thinking beings, Wendy's tries to dazzle us with bullshit. Like we're all Homer Simpson, and we'll be thinking "Mmm, made-to-order food," rather than "What the hell are they afraid of? They don't want us to know we're eating eight days worth of saturated fat in a six-minute span??

Since I'm attractive and successful, they're imbeciles of the first degree.