Wednesday, May 16, 2012

This little quiz is circling the internet today, and I think it's kind of fun. What a time capsule! I mean, if it were written today, there'd be a picture of nosegays and limp wrists attached.

Still, in the years since it was written it's become absolutely useless. The world has gotten so manly they'd probably rank Betty White lesbian. Nobody has flowered drapes. Nobody likes to make slip covers. And dancing is feminine? Okay.

I'm not particularly manly, but I scored a 6. I'd have scored higher, but I refused to answer the "favorite star" question, because anybody who has a favorite star is a big girl's blouse. And really, manly men prefer female stars? Two words: ETHEL MERMAN.

Despite the dated questions, this test reaffirmed to me that I'm a real man. How? A real man will ask, "Why didn't they give 0 points for the manly things and 1 point for the womanly things so dudes wouldn't have to add?" And even if changing times have rendered it nearly useless, there's still one thing you can be sure of about somebody who takes this test. If they come up with a score of 1, like the guy who posted this on BuzzFeed, they're heterosexual.