The Ten Stupidest Things People Said to the Crew of Flight 1549

-- I saw The Cable Guy on an airplane a few years ago, and I'm thinking you people got the better deal.

-- Were you, like, serving goose on the plane, and maybe that flock threw themselves at you because they were mad?

-- I'd like to thank all you flight attendants on America's behalf: namely, Donna Dent, age 51; Sheila Dail, age 57; and Doreen Welsh, age 58.

-- I'm a reporter for Channel 7. If people have nine lives like cats, how many have you used up and how?

-- I was a passenger in first class. Does this mean my massage is off?

-- So, are there like five thousand tiny bottles of alcohol at the bottom of the Hudson today?

-- Did you actually see the giant hand of God close around the plane and lower you to safety?

-- I swear, the next time I take a plane flight, I'm going to listen to all the bullshit you stewardesses say.

-- As a tribute to the bravery of the Flight 1549 crew I stomped eight geese today.

-- Captain, my name's RomanHans. I'd really like to shake your hand . . . or any other body part you want.